Here we go

Well Friday morning started with me having to tell my husband that he was wrong. No baby on the way. Our second try at clomid was a fail. After curling in bed just to be held, I regained my stregth and determination to keep trying and know that this baby will come in God's timing. However, also accepting in my heart that this baby may be along way off. I have spent the week sorting, packing and preparing to donate baby items. Keeping those that I love, and donating the rest. It was a hard process and very emotional at times however at the same time, I know we will make great memories in the reclaimed space!

So today we begin our 3rd and final round of just clomid. Not looking forward to the side effects but atleast I am only working 2 days this week so that will help with the sleepless nights! We are praying this cycle works, but also preparing mentally for our first round of Artificial insemination to begin the week before Christmas.

This week needs prayer

Well we are on the final week of round 2 of clomid. I have so many emotions that Thursday can not come soon enough! On Thursday I will know if a little one was conceived this round or not. Then I would go for test and ultrasounds to make sure the baby had a heartbeat, growing and how many.

I tried so hard not to get my hopes up this round. However, that has now failed. Aaron and so many other people are so sure that this is our month. I pray that they are right. 18 months of heartache due to negative pregnancy test is very hard on the heart, spirit, and pocket! Yes Aaron and I have had some moments this past week that really make us think that this time it has worked. However, we have also had those thoughts before. My feelings are all over the place. Anxious and excited to know but also Sad and down as I think, why would this month be any different?

Please keep us in your prayers this week as we wait and see, not only that there may be a baby but also for the emotions we feel when there is yet again only one line on the pregnancy test.

round 2

So just noticed I hadn't written in exactly a month so thought I should do an update! Cycle one of clomid was filled with a lot of side effects! Crazy emotions, hot flashes, headaches, insomnia and the worst , a big fat negative pregnancy test. I responded really well to the meds as my ovulation number was 12 without clomid (10 or higher is good) and with clomid it was over 20. However, october was just not my month to find out I was expecting.

So off to round 2! The week of pumpkin show I started my second round of clomid. Normal hot flashes the week of the medicine but after that I have had no side effects. Of course, instead of making me happy, this concerns me! I am afraid that since not as many side effects it means that there is no little one in there. Only time will tell. If not, I will begin my 3rd and final round of clomid (at least without other treatment) around Thanksgiving. Aaron and I decided not to start any new treatments after that until the first of the year. I would have a minor surgery to check and see if my HSG test missed scar tissue from my c-section or appendicitis. If all is good, then our goal is to start IUI in February. Hopefully this little one decides to come on clomid though instead of going that route!